How’s that for a headline, huh?
Well, to be honest I didn’t come up with that saying.
The first time I heard it was from a former mentor of mine.
He said it a lot.
And he always followed it up with…
Now get over it!!!
But here’s the thing…
If you’re fucked up, telling someone to get over it isn’t going to make a damn bit of difference.
If they knew how to get over it, then they wouldn’t be f’ed up in the first place. So the “now get over it” part never made a lot of sense to me.
But I 100% agree with the headline. Every single one of us is f’ed up in some way. Whether we like to admit it or not, we all are.
I mean hell…
I overthink and stress a lot of stuff that I shouldn’t, and it’s held me back more than you could ever know. Hell… its almost killed me.
But I’ve made massive strides on that over the years, and it’s made a huge difference.
But here’s the whole thing about being f’ed up….
No… seriously, it really is O.K.
Regardless of what others might say or you may think. It really is O.K. to be fucked up. Why?
Because it means your human.
It means there are parts of you that people can relate to.
It means that you can grow and improve your life to the levels you really want.
If you weren’t at least a little f’ed up. I’d be really worried.
Now over the years you’ve been alive.. You’ve been told it’s not good to admit (especially guys) that there is something wrong with you.
That it’s wrong to let people in. It’s not just others saying this, it’s your own fears about what people are going to think about you if you show some of your issues.
And here’s the thing about that. You are worrying about those things, and other are worrying about their things. They are not worrying about your issues. They don’t really care about your issues. They just care about theirs, and don’t want anyone else to know about them.
So we are all worrying about what others are going to think about us when in reality, we are only focused on ourselves.
For example, I know I don’t sit there and think about Robert DeNiro’s issues, or Jimmy Fallon’s, or anyones really. I just think about mine, my family, and my clients. That’s it.
I’m guessing it’s pretty similar for you too.
So It’s O.K. to be a little screwed up. It makes you human. Plus we all know that we are all screwed up. We’re just afraid to admit it.
The funny thing is, just me mentioning this to you could be causing you to feel offended in some way.
And if this is bothering you to read this…
Then it means that it’s right.
You wouldn’t have a reaction if it wasn’t true.
Is It Really That Big Of A Deal?
Yeah I get it, if we admit that we’re screwed up to others…
It shows weakness, vulnerability, and faults.
And there’s that fear that if someone sees those faults and vulnerable parts that it somehow is going to make things worse.
Well here’s the thing…
If you’re already messed up, how’s sharing it going to make things worse?
If anything it’s going to let people connect with you more, and see the real authentic you.
But it’s not your fault that you are messed up. Well, to a degree it’s not. It’s the way our culture and society teaches us how to live that is the constant reinforcement that everything needs to be perfect and good.
The funny thing is, the most popular tv shows/movies/songs in the world are popular mostly because it shows those peoples faults.
If you think about it, it’s O.K. for a songwriter to talk about the most f’ed up shit in their life in a song. But they don’t talk about it publicly outside of that. Why is that?
It’s some kind of weird double standard.
And yeah, some of it’s personal and they don’t need to talk about it… but they wrote it in a friggin’ song. So why wouldn’t they talk about it anywhere else.
Makes no sense.
It just goes to show that our cultural and societal influences play a huge role in us masking our real selves.
How About The People You Connect With?
Think about this…
The people you probably connect with the most are also the ones who are the most open about what they struggle with… right?
I know those are the people I connect with the most, and also those are the ones I have the best conversations with.
It’s because it’s so damn interesting to see how people manage and cope with their…
Fucked upness. Is that even a word lol???
So if you’re struggling internally, or struggling in business why do you think that is?
And yes, there are external factors to some of this, but if you’re struggling in any part of your life or business, it’s probably because something is f’ed up in an area of your life.
And that’s O.K.
So if we’re all messed up, what’s the big deal about opening up and sharing it?
It makes no sense not too.
Now if you are one of those people who bitch and moan about every little problem in life, then you need to NOT share it.
The people who do need to share are the ones who are afraid to open up and let these things out. It’s the fact that you are not opening up about it that is causing so many of the issues.
So would you rather go on and struggle, or would you rather admit it, look at it, and then work on changing it?
Speaking of that…
You know what else doesn’t make any sense?
Why do athletes, people trying to lose weight, entrepreneurs all talk so publicly about having a coach/ trainer/ or a mentor…
But when it comes to thing that controls all of that… their mind… they would either…
A) Never seek professional help or…
B) Never admit they are getting therapy?
For the most important thing that controls everything they do (their mind) why would they not want to get help?
Or what I like to call a “mind coach.”
Makes no sense right?
So if I’m f’ed up, and you’re f’ed up, and we are all f’ed up, then what’s the big deal to any of this or seeking the help you need?
It isn’t a big deal.
And if you understand and can admit that we are all a little bat shit crazy, then that’s the first step to moving in the right direction in your life.
The second step is to talk with someone about it, and see if they can help you navigate some of those rough waters.
And if you want someone to chat privately about some of this or biz stuff, just hit me up, and let me know.
I’m no certified shrink. But I do know a thing or too, about a thing or too. And if I’m not able to help, then I can easily refer you to someone who does.
So feel free to hit me up by clicking the link or image below, and let’s move past the “it’s not good to admit I’m fucked up” thing.
Because once you can admit this, and we talk, things start to flow A LOT better.